Ok, well I've been busy lately...trying to survive as an employee, mom, wife, sister, mother, daughter, friend. Some things fall to the side to make room for others.
I am back now, at this moment at least, and feel that I will try to return again soon as I need an outlet. It is so easy to get caught up in the daily grind that time passes and one begins to feel like a solitary rocket speeding through time and space heading nowhere.
I have fallen into my sleeping well, but never waking restful phases where my entire night's sleep is filled with super detailed dreams. I can fall asleep quickly, and if you wake me up within 10 minutes, I will already have dreams to share, if I wake up hours later, the story from my head is longer and more detailed, and if I hit the snooze button, I feel as if I am still awake, yet dreaming simultaneously until my alarm blares again 7 minutes later. The result is a tired person wandering through the day as a zombie after a full 8 hours of "uninterrupted" sleep. I wish that I could turn it off, I enjoy the stories my mind invents, I desperately want to feel rested. I am known for my wild dreams, the tales my brain shares with me are legendary. It really feels like I am watching the most personal and detailed movie I have ever seen in my life, and when I wake up, I remember a great deal of detail. I understand this happens to most people occasionally, but I can go through this for months at a time with no break. I don't know if this is a blessing or a curse. I will take it for face value and try to enjoy the world beyond my consciousness. One day I will have the time and energy to write down everything I remember and I will make millions writing novels and screenplays entertaining the masses. Or I will end up in a looney bin because the drivel that comes out of my head makes no sense and I am really just a crazy person. Until then, I will go back to work and struggle through the remainder of the day.
Parker returns this evening from a 4 day visit with Nana and Papa. I miss him so much! I can't wait for a big hug....you know after he has had his fit because he realizes he is stuck with daddy and I instead of Nana and Papa, and after we have had to console him with pizza for dinner and his favourite tv show to calm him down. It will still be worth it. That kid gives the best hugs!
